Yes another one ha. I can't stop like I said. If you follow them & read...then that's cool but i'm not putting these up here for anyone special...just for me. so yeah ha.
Um you ever have something happen to you & you regret it & go thru the cycle of all your emoitions. Then you think your over everything & then you find out some other shit & it just twist your whole shit all around? well i had that shit happen to me....twice in a matter of a week. it's surprising & also funny the way peoples minds work...I mean like i didn't know bad news could get worse. Ya know what i'm saying? Like your mad about 1 thing & then get told something totally different & be mad about that annndddddd then be told something that makes you feel good & like shit & confuses the shit outta you. I don't know anymore man....i'm at a loss. I don't know what to do. ha. It's sad. I feel dumb...because of what i was told that maybe...just maybe i had a little hope of getting it all back...but then you realize that you have no chance to get it back. thats something that can only happen in your dreams. but while you sit & dream about it all you think to yourself that the reason for why the things are the way they are isn't clear. You can't be placed as a role player & wanna be the star player. & in most cases if you can't handle that you should leave that team....but what if you like that team so much...you think & as i said just a thought...you think that your in love with that team & never wanna leave...what if you love that city & you wanna retire there..it's a feeling that i think i'm having but i don't wanna get ahead of myself & sound crazy...get me? I'm just saying idk...that i once was the star player but someone else came along that was i guess more talented than me & now i gotta ride the bench watching this other guy try to win the championship...
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